emotional beginnings

And so a break my silence!

Sorry I have been a little MIA, life has become a bit of a distraction – by which I mean I totally haven’t had time to sit down, glass of wine, chocolate, James Bay and my laptop for a good’ol brain dump. Well tonight you lucky things I am well overdue a good brain fart…

Today was a beginning of a very new chapter for us and it feels only fitting that my break in silence is to talk about the whole reason I started this blog nearly 4 years ago. The reason for all my ramblings and continuous mum fails – the reason why and how I have become the mum I am today.

Today Little miss s started school – cue teary eyes and a sunglass wearing school run! She is only just 4 and whilst she was getting ready at 6.30am this morning and forgetting to put on her skirt it dawned on me that this is it my little miss s is growing up, becoming independent (ok bar me pointing out that she needs to cover her pants in public) and starting out on this very exciting journey for the main part by herself. I really didn’t know how I was going to feel today, the run up to the whole ‘starting big school’ has been a looong one – it started last September in pre-school and our daily walks past ‘big school’. If I am really honest with myself I think that ever since that first day last September I have known this day would come but never actually thought it would (I know makes no sense!!.. normal service as resumed!)

And so she went, within a space of an hour getting ready this morning I felt so many emotions, emotions that I really do think define the mum/person that little miss s has turned me into…

Fear – what if she doesn’t like it? What if she falls over and needs me?
Annoyance – It was 6.30am and she was parading around the house in her shirt, pants and shoes!
Anger – at myself for maybe not making her last week with me and master R more special – we went to Sainsbury’s and Co-op, pretty much it.
Sadness – what am I going to do without my little sidekick
Relief – ah the things I am going to get done without my little sidekick
Impatience – seriously, I was ready to pick her up at 2.30pm clock watching

And most of just Pride – so much pride at the little girl that she has become, the fact that at only just 4 she strode into that school on her own with no fears just excitement, that at the end of the day she casually strode out as if this was normal (I was kinda hoping for a big emotional reunion!) but most of all that she is who she is and she is happy with that. I know she’s only 4 but it’s a bloody good start.

Congratulations to all the other school starters this week, kids, mums teachers and young siblings who miss you like crazy!

little miss in school  little miss in school

A grown up weekend

I have had such a grown up weekend – I am currently in bed sipping a Peroni – like I said, a grown up weekend! Now this doesn’t happen very often and it’s been pure bliss to enjoy drinks, friends, happy babies, waffles, Prosecco, ‘wuv you’s’ rugby, shopping, baths and as I said Peroni in bed!

Friday night i enjoyed a wonderful meal with friends (that K cooked and that hasn’t killed me…yet!) good chat, flowing wine and homemade brownies were topped off with some good pals and fans of everything ketchup A and C – thank you ladies for giving me a major ego boost! Stories of A’s car key antics and K putting the ice cream in the microwave made for an all round hilarious evening… and little miss s stayed asleep…result!

Saturday saw us enjoy waffles for brekkie and a strangely well behaved baby watching the rugby… 5 hours in one place and we had no tantrums. Its funny how damn proud you could be of a well behaved baby, she played nicely with the other kids – by that I mean she didn’t hit or ‘tickle’ anyone (seriously last week she closed the door on a poor babies head, she can be a little ‘over’ friendly!) she smiled at all the right times and even clapped at the rugby (all be it for Italy but I have a feeling Dan may have told her to do this!!) little miss s also said love you K which literally melted my heart, all I have to do now is drill home love you mummy and I’m sorted.

Now today was just lush! All I have to say about today is…
Baby gone
Sleep
12noon bath
Freshly shaven legs! (Also note to self, when you notice that the bath is full of leg hair your a little overdue a shave!)
Surprise shopping trip
Leather skirt
Bills dinner (like Jamie’s but sooo much nicer!)
Fizzy wine, Elderflower and Raspberry
Baby home
Cwtch’s
Peroni in bed!

I hope you had lovely weekends, Night all x

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when did i become a ‘dropper’?

I used to be able to catch, run and had co-ordination… Seriously what happened? Did I get old and not notice? When did I start to actually throw like a girl?! I have become a mum and in turn become girly… 2013 needs to be the year I get my man back (by that I mean catching, fearless attitude, the who gives a ** look and being able to run without wanting a wee every 5 steps!

All in all 2012 has been a good year, a year of firsts like my first Mothers
Day, and my constant battle between life and baby… As well as the baby-less trip to Norway that just left me a blubbering mess!

There are changes afoot – 2013 is going to be a tough year, already Jean Claude has been sold and we are preparing to move house. A move we don’t really want to make but one that we need to make if we want to make our home in Wales! I also have more appointments for my Bells Palsy and have everything crossed that this will be the year my smile returns to ‘normal’! It’s that time of year when you write a list of everything you want to do but realistically you know will never get done, so here’s my 2013 bucket list…

1. Scare myself
2. Learn a new skill and get more crafty
3. See something I’ve never seen before
4. Bake a cake that actually rises
5. Get my smile back
6. Finally do my wedding album
7. Be more proactive
8. Get more work
9. Learn to be a housewife!
10. Embrace the ‘saving’

And a couple of our 2012 memories, Happy New Year everyone!

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